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![]() Jack Daniels anymore No waking up beside a stranger Or sprawled out on the floor Ain't no tales of passing out About losing their memory But, after what I found out tonight You'll be getting one from me I'm smoking whiskey, drinking cigarettes Until my eyes turn red Those aren't tear drops that you see I'm angry as hell instead I just found out that girl of mine Has been shaking it with other men They've stretched her out so damn bad I need a board to keep from falling in I know you think I'm not so nice And showing very little tact That's really something coming from you Missus mattress strapped to your back I ain't too fond of you right now In fact, I really hate your guts And I never did like the way you gave Head! And slobbered on my nuts Nobody's writing songs about Jack Daniels anymore No waking up beside a stranger Or sprawled out on the floor Ain't no tales of passing out About losing their memory But, after what I found out tonight You'll be getting one from me I really didn't have much of a clue I was a bit naive you see About the only thing that tipped me off Was the burning I had going pee I went to see my family doc He said, "Son, I think you're being silly" I said, "Doc, then how do you explain?" "All the pus that's oozing from my willy?" I'm still smoking more whiskey, drinking more cigarettes My eyes are getting redder than hell I just can't believe I bought your bill of goods I guess I didn't know you that well There's only one thing left to do Kick your sorry ass right out of the door Cause you're positively, absolutely, undeniably A no good, dirty, rotten whore Positively, absolutely, undeniably A no good, dirty, rotten whore Nobody's writing songs about Jack Daniels anymore No waking up beside a stranger Or sprawled out on the floor Ain't no tales of passing out About losing their memory But, after what I found out tonight You'll be getting one from me ![]() |